Spring and Chaos?

Ah, spring! Youth! Romance!

I am coming to you live as a newly minted college graduate! Which is alternately exciting and soul-crushingly terrifying. I overheard a classmate stating that they were afraid of graduation because it meant they would be officially unemployed… and alcoholic. I’m not in nearly as dire straits as this individual was, but I’m still feeling that scary “Shit, now I have to be a real adult” kind of feeling.

Anyway, that isn’t really either here or there, quite frankly. Yet it does also strike me as odd that in the context of impending graduation in the previous few weeks I’ve suddenly found myself reading piles of shoujo romance. In fact, I’m kind of embarrassed at the trend my manga-reading has taken as of late – yeah, I’ve still got tons of yuri and BL about adults that I’ve been chowing down on (in addition to Aoi Hana and Girl Friends), but I’ve also been reading loads of things with sparkles and bishounen and… flowers that aren’t lilies. What the hell?

I suppose one could suggest that I am merely reacting to the forced reality of the adult world by retreating into fantasy in order to soothe my terrified soul. That could certainly hold some water. After all, I’ve used books in that manner in the past – middle school really sucked, I survived it by consuming insane amounts of books. And when high school kind of hit the skids in its later years, I reacted in a similar manner. Literature has kept me alive and from becoming wholly depressed. Yay reading!

At the same time, I’m not sure that would be quite it – I don’t need happy stories to distract me from reality, after all, and I actually read a lot of pretty bummer stuff when I was in middle school and high school (which probably explains why Ethan Frome was my favorite book… and, well, still is one of my favorites). If anything, happy-happy romance-type stuff was a total turn-off to me. Well, ok, unless it was BL manga, but that’s because I’ve been a nasty perv roughly since 2003 (wow, a third of my life as a nasty perv… not bad). Escaping into literature has never required me to find some mushy stuff.

No, I think there is something far more insidious afoot.

I’d like to digress for a moment, though. Although I’ve been reading a bunch of sparkly, sparkly shoujo stuff (none of that sparkly vampire crap, though, let me assure you), I found myself pretty disappointed in the offerings of Harlequin. I was looking for some pretty shallow romance fluff, but their junk was just TOO shallow. I get that these are one volume offerings, but I’ve seen five-page one-shots with more heart and believability than these…

Anyway, where was I?

Oh, yes – something far more insidious afoot.


Day… has fallen in love.


Cue existential crisis. It isn’t like this is the first time this has ever happened, but I’ve been pretty happy with just, y’know, watching anime, shooting things, and outdrinking everyone on campus for the past year or so. So I’m not too thrilled with this sudden onset of retardedness, which apparently includes a desire to read every single one of Chiho Saito’s works (uh, excepting the fucked up ones like Kanon, that is) (hint: Kanon has incest… and it isn’t twincest, so it isn’t wincest).

I am violating some sacred tenet of anime blogging – the anime blogger obviously should not possess anything resembling a “real” life outside of anime and blogging (ghostlightning doesn’t count… ‘cause otherwise he’s REALLY screwed this one up, what with the whole ‘wife and kid’ thing). I am quite clearly committing grand treason against my craft. I am daring to swap my adoration of new chapters of Aoi Hana or new episodes of Yumeiro Pattissiere for the likes of… romance.

And yet…!

These delicate little feelings are entirely one-sided! I have absolutely no chance! All I can do is be wonderful and yet hear them talk about someone else! Hallelujah! I haven’t totally betrayed my principles! I am still a good citizen of the aniblogosphere (hint: jpmeyer is not a good citizen of the aniblogosphere)!


Or, well, never quite committed full-on treason in the first place.

Now I can go on to pine away slightly over these feelings and assuage the sweet sadness with endless episodes of Air, Clannad, and Kanon. Yes, perhaps I am not thrilled with my lot, but look at those poor, innocent, fragile, sad girls in the sun/sakura/snow! I want to protect them! With my penis vagina!

And that statement, my friends, is why this is not a family-friendly blog.

Anyway, expect some sort of post in the near future on Chiho Saito’s Waltz in the White Dress, which was actually kind of an interesting read in light of the recent controversy regarding the currently-airing Senkou no Night Raid. I’d say why, but I’m pretty sure that would take away any impetus at all for that promised post.

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15 Responses to Spring and Chaos?

    • adaywithoutme says:


      Hey, just be glad I decided to not question your blogging legitimacy on grounds of you actually having a life.

  1. Mint says:

    Bloggers can have lives! Rebel~! Graduating from college is a big thing.
    Shoujo has always been a fallback for me (despite the excessive sparkles lol), a sort of nostalgic, reliable, pleasure that I enjoy despite its predictability and stereotypes. The shallower series are a little less enjoyable, but the sweet and ever cheery romcoms never fail (unless they go overboard…).

    • adaywithoutme says:

      I’m still steering pretty clear of the truly melodramatic titles – teen angst just doesn’t do it for me, y’know? So I’ve been reading a bunch of historical ones, because the angst factor in those comes across as more legit – as in, people having been betrothed since a young age to someone else or other family duties getting in the way. I can roll with angst over that, because that’s a bit more insurmountable than, I dunno, not being in the same class as your crush.

  2. Baka-Raptor says:

    Hey, even I fell in love once. Just kidding.

    The last day of school is always a happy occasion and calls for listening nonstop to A Goofy Movie’s “After Today”:

    • adaywithoutme says:

      Everyone knows dinosaur law students have no time for love.

      I will listen to After Today whenever I am not in bumfuck, West Virginia, because then I will actually have the connections speed necessary for it to load.

  3. 2DT says:

    If he isn’t already taken in a boyfriend-girlfriend sense, then why not ask him out? You never know. 😉

    Unless it’s already gotten to the point where you’ve convinced yourself that you don’t want to ruin the friendship, and that you’re okay with what you have now. Then, well… Good luck!

    • adaywithoutme says:

      Haha, well, they’re still in college, and I’m going the thousand miles back home, so… Haha. Oh well.

  4. Aorii says:

    Somehow I thought the “not falling in love IRL, except for otakuisms” only applied to the guys xD except those few like ghostlightning and stripey xD

    *gets stoned* JK JK!!

    Well I just went through (and maybe still ongoing) a bit of this myself so… meh, I think everyone (except those otakus =9) knows.
    And I’m still reading sparkly sparkly shoujo (including the happy-happy ones), after about a year since college graduation, so I absolutely do not see what’s wrong with it. /o/

    • adaywithoutme says:

      Alright, just wanna say that when you said ‘*gets stoned*’ the meaning you meant wasn’t the one I initially thought of.

      Ok, my laptop is about to die, I’ll say something more relevant later.

  5. glothelegend says:

    Actually on the way home from class (I have one more final then it’s time for summer!) I was thinking to myself, and decided that I am in love with all women. Unlike most people, who need to get to know someone to love them, I need to get to know someone to hate them.

    I usually end up hating people after a week. The love does not last long.

  6. omisyth says:

    Pfft, love is overrated. Now lust and burning desire, that’s the stuff of kings/queens.

  7. ETERNAL says:

    I still say that falling in love is one of the worst things that can happen to a person (not really, but you know what I mean). Use the power of shoujo manga!

  8. kluxorious says:

    I feel you. I’m in love too and is completely one sided. Sorta. Kinda. I dunno but I’m not going to risk myself dating a shouta. Or have I? Fuck this is confusing.

    But congratulations. Being in love in wonderful.

  9. Caddy C says:

    Welcome to the post-undergrad world! It sucks! 🙂

    Good luck with the other stuff too, and I’m sure there are more than a couple of anibloggers who have a secret girlfriend/boyfriend/crush/3d love interest of some sort 😛 I’m totally out of whack since I have a long-term boyfriend (going on 7 years, christ….) and live with him!

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