So! The enemy has attacked! Time to get naked in public!
I wish I had been in Washington, D.C. yesterday, keeping the fear alive and meeting people from the internet… but, no, I was/am in… Idaho. Boise, Idaho. I suppose at least I got to see the blue field in person. And, uh, LaTech get their guts ripped out all over it.
When I was a kid, I really wanted to be a magical girl. I blame Sailor Moon for this primarily, as it was my first experience with anime waaay back in the day. I figured I that I had until I was fourteen or fifteen before I would have to give up on it completely, since Usagi became Sailor Moon when she was fourteen. I’d stress, though, that I didn’t actually believe I would become a magical girl… more like I maintained this faint hope that somehow I would, that somehow they existed.
Yeah, that didn’t happen. Didn’t stop me from buying a set of Clow Cards and a few Sailor Moon wands, though! And these days
When I was a kid, I really wanted to be a magical girl. I blame Sailor Moon for this primarily, as it was my first experience with anime waaay back in the day. I figured I that I had until I was fourteen or fifteen before I would have to give up on it completely, since Usagi became Sailor Moon when she was fourteen. I’d stress, though, that I didn’t actually believe I would become a magical girl… more like I maintained this faint hope that somehow I would, that somehow they existed.
Yeah, that didn’t happen. Didn’t stop me from buying a set of Clow Cards and a few Sailor Moon wands, though! And these days, I figure its better to not be a magical girl, ’cause, seriously, they have to deal with a bunch of undignified shit. Naked transformations, “panty” shots, short skirts… it just doesn’t pay to be a magical girl. Figuratively and literally.
1. Public nakedness.
Transformation sequences are frequently the bane of viewers’ existences, since its just recycled animation every single time, with the only differences coming from whether the full sequence is shown, or whether it is intercut with other sequences in multi-magical girl shows such as Sailor Moon or Pretty Cure. But the fact is, the viewer is lucky – the viewer can fastforward through it, or they can use it as a chance to go use the bathroom quickly. Meanwhile, the magical girl? She’s naked! In public!
It is true that there are varying degrees of nakedness to be had, from the fully naked (Princess Tutu, the second season of Kamikaze Kaitou Jeanne) to the covered in ribbons, bubbles, colors, etc. (Sailor Moon, Wedding Peach). But the fact is, you’re losing your clothes in public. Sure, you may be hiding behind a conveniently placed fence or shed or something, but there’s always that chance that someone just happens around the corner while you’re spinning around, waiting for all that new clothing to get properly into place. And often, you’re there transforming away with your team-mates, whom are often people you don’t really know at all to start off with. Talk about embarrassing!
Of course, the worst of this is when you get beaten up so badly that your transformation starts to flag. Probably the most egregious example was in Sailor Moon Sailor Stars. Sailor Moon is getting her ass kicked, and her transformation goes completely on the blink, leaving her wrapped up in ribbons. Then, the ribbons fall off, leaving her with just her wings and the moon on her forehead. She beats the bad guy, but cries because all her friends have died… but then they all suddenly appear! And she’s completely naked! Talk about undignified.
2. Short skirts, tight torsos, etc.
Well, at least the transformations only last a few seconds, right? Now they’ve got their clothes on at least…
Wait, what? High heels and mini-skirts? To fight evil in? Great, so not only are you stuck dodging death on a weekly basis, but now your ass is hanging out everywhere, your boobs are mashed together in some skin-tight top, and you’re trying to run around in hooker heels. There’s just no catching any breaks.
It could be worse, I suppose; at least most magical girls get to wear outfits that are a bit more dignified than the ones the Queens Blade ladies get to run around fighting in. Even so, as a magical girl you don’t even get to fight crime while wearing something comfortable and sensible. Nope, you’ve gotta stay looking cute and shit. Hey, can you lean over a little more while you blast your attack at that monster? I can’t see your…
3. “Panty” shot
This really ties into the above. The fact is, though, that it isn’t so straightforward as just a panty shot. No, it’s the “panty” shot, more often than not, as we are greeted with a glimpse of the heroine’s… leotard. Y’know, it may be white, folks, and it may look exactly like a pair of panties, but come on, we’re not that crass! It’s just her leotard, geez!
Of course, not every magical girl is sporting a leotard, so sometimes it really is a panty shot. Or her skirt’s very short, but you’ll see a hint of ass and nothing of panties at all.
4. Outfits made from flimsy material
What, your magical girl costume was made in China and cost a quarter? Well, isn’t that convenient! I guess when this villain blasts you, you’re just gonna have to contend with your clothes ripping and your boobs and butt hanging out, huh? Have fun getting anyone to take you seriously! What, you killed the bad guy and saved all the people on the formerly-possessed roller coaster? Great, now can we ask you what your sizes are?
When you factor in the fact that the magical girl is often a reluctant hero, it sure seems like a raw deal. Its bad enough getting forced to risk life and limb, but you also get stuck with all of the above? Totally sucks! At least it seems like most magical girls don’t have to exist under the enforced virginity rule like the magical girls in the world of Oku-sama wa Mahou Shoujo.
And, yeah, Sakura is probably a bad choice for the above picture, since she pretty much avoids these indignities, but she looks more Halloween-ish than most do.
GAR GAR Stegosaurus 
I suppose I’d have to give up the dream too at some point…
DON’T GIVE UP ON THE DREAM,
DON’T GIVE UP ON THE WANTING!!!
Wow, no, really, a song with those lyrics was playing in the background when I clicked to view comments.
At this point, I think my dream is just that after I die I get reincarnated into the Pokemon world. Or the Pokemon world is actually what the afterlife is made of.
My high school had an exchange program with a high school from Idaho. I had no idea what the point was, nor did I participate.
I once wrote a short story about using a potato to smuggle vodka into a sporting event in Idaho.
I was particularly saddened about being unable to attend the March to Keep the Fear Alive since it meant I couldn’t meet you. I even memorized the secret pass-phrase! I was all excited to meet a few bloggers I know (of?) and are gay for… actually, no, I’m only gay for you. I have blog-crushes on the others.
It just goes to show that Nanoha isn’t all that bad. She wears a long skirt in battle and the heals are very reasonable. Point four is also considered since her battle dress is armor and the only clothing damage I remember her taking was from a rocket powered sledgehammer and that just returned her civilian shirt.
With you summarizing all the potential moe factors of the magical girl genre, I think you’ve just lowered the interest index of the moe demographic by a large margin.
I’m not exactly sure I get what you’re saying.
Any comment on the sidekick? I’ve found them to be sort of an in-between thing.. marginally useful at best, annoying at worst. Woe be to the mahou shoujo unlucky enough to deal with the latter for they never. go. away. ARGH!
They really aren’t undignified, though, as even if they’re pretty stupid and lame themselves, often the magical girl herself likes them for whatever reason.
It’s true. I loved Sailor Moon in middle school, but I never decided if fighting bad guys in heels and mini skirts was part of the feminist narrative. I think it’s decidedly Third Wave, though. Also, transforming in public/semi-public would be awkward.
Yeah, Sailor Moon is a bit of a challenge as far as feminism goes. A fourteen year old girl saves the world! But she’s wearing a mini-skirt! And she only dreams of being a bride! Although I appreciate the fact that the ladies save the day continuously, and that Sailor Moon progresses to the point where she doesn’t need Tuxedo Kamen to boost her spirits when she’s fighting, I think it probably falls on the side of “No.” since the episode-to-episode storylines run fairly traditional in terms of roles for women, along with the aforementioned fact that Usagi just wants to be a bride and doesn’t care about doing well in school at all as a result.
I THINK an earlier version of your entry snuck into this one. Just a hunch.
As for these tropes you mention, we may have to categorize shows as “Pre-Sailor Moon” and “Post-Sailor Moon,” because that was really a bit of a Clark Singularity moment, as far as the genre goes.
There is a really big difference between the pre- and post-Sailor Moon shows, probably the most obvious being the usage of the sentai set-up in magical girl shows. There has been a slight retreat on that since, although Pretty Cure stands as a pretty big example of the sentai format in magical girl that persists. It also popularized the notion of the magical girl as a fighter of crime and evil as opposed to just being able to do cool things because you’re now someone else, a la Hime-chan no Ribbon or Mahou Tsukai Sally.
And, of course, now we’ve got so many of those moe magical girl shows meant for young men as opposed to young girls… *eyeroll*
I actually wrote this in one sitting, but I was rushing since I was trying to get it done before I had to board my flight, so its probably got some editing issues.